Pregnant woman steals smoothie (Coolidge Corner)

Pregnant woman who steals smoothie (Coolidge corner)

---

Reply to: pers-8jcja-1136776996@craigslist.org ^{[Errors when replying to ads?]}
Date: 2009-04-23, 4:11PM EDT

As soon as she walked into the creperie I didn’t trust her. She had the shifty eyes, a mustache, and a strange bulge protruding from below her breasts. I didn’t want to stare, I hear that people with large tumors don’t like them stared at. I had just finished ordering my smoothie when she bellied up to the counter and turned her arctic stare to the menu and then to me.

The clerk called out my order “One massive strawberry banana smoothie”

“Thank God!” I thought to myself, I didn’t know how much more scrutiny I could stand from this woman. She must have noticed me staring at her tumor er, stomach.

I reached for my smoothie, when it was snatched from beneath my hand! The harpy had appropriated it for her own! I was shocked, but I would not let this travesty stand.

“Excuse me ma’am, that’s my smoothie” I said politely

“I’m pregnant!” She growled at me.

I knew that some other entity had to be pulling the strings, the thing that was within her was controlling her actions entirely. Her eyes narrowed as she glared at me over the top of my smoothie cup. I returned her glare stare for stare.

“Ma’am regardless of your inability to use a prophylactic, that is my smoothie, I paid for it, and I am certain that the people who work here would be more than willing to make you one”

I took my smoothie from her hand and walked out the door. Leaving her sputtering in my wake.

• Location: Coolidge corner